kaleidoscoping chaos...: parent

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Wednesday, April 11, 2012

It's a matzah pizza sorta day...

Today was a "matzah pizza" sort of day"... It was cold out. It was sunny out. It even rained at one point. It was sometimes cloudy. It was often windy. We did some fun stuff like "decorating" - which I had not let myself do until ALL of the boxes were unpacked. The kids and I hung pictures, put things on shelves and and continued some wall decaling (is that a word). We were all very excited about the "wall decaling" - more on that later. But in the end, it was an ordinary day albeit a day during Passover. Lots of playing, reading books, trying to run around outside and of course eating our meals. My big "exciting" thing of the day for the kids: matzah pizza. An old stand by of Passover moms everywhere: one piece of matzah, jar of sauce, and some mozzarella cheese - 6 minutes in the toaster over and there you have it... matzah pizza. The idea is great if you are 2.8 years old and it definitely satisfies the "I need to eat something I am starving" moaning stomach of the 41 year mommy keeping Passover (and the 1 yr old watching it all go down from her high chair apparently finds it all hilarious). So there you have it - a matzah pizza day... Tomorrow I am thinking it is potatoe pancakes (from the box) and applesauce... whoop whoop!

very excited about this new invention called matzah pizza - he ate 4 bites and then went back to kicking the blow up matzah balls around the kitchen and smashing into Mr Pharaoh calling him Batman...

Vera did not stop giggling all through lunch. She had avocados, pears, cheese and some bits of the matzah pizza and was just happy!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

PACE, Playgroup & Passover Cake...

When Jonah was born I took a "class" called P.A.C.E. Moms. A number of DC moms had recommended it to me. It was basically a 'mommy & me' class for urban moms with their first children in Washington DC. We started when Jonah was about 2 mos, I think. We were 10 moms and 12 babies (2 sets of twins). We sat on the floor with our babies. We had these looks on our faces like we hadn't slept in months and these crazy looks in our eyes that just screamed, "what they hell is going on and what are we doing???" The class was once a week for 2 hours for ten weeks. It was one of the best things that I ever did. I needed it so much. Just to have a place to talk and listen to other moms and realize that you weren't the only one who thought, "yes, this is a wonderful experience, but it is also f-king hard." Anyway, since then I have tried to remain friends with many of my "first" mom friends and I have met other moms through them. There is this one group of stay-at-home moms that I have been in a playgroup with for the past three years. The group has had members come and go. I myself took a leave of absence when we moved to Chicago for 6 mos (surely there will be future post on that little adventure), another hiatus when I was battling breast cancer last year (yes, I am sure another post will deal with that...) and most recently when we bowed out for about a month because we had to escape our old condo due to a rodent problem and live in Baltimore (yes, another post on that adventure as well).

Here is how it works: each round of playgroup, we (one of the moms-the same one-always does this-she is totally awesome for doing so) set up a schedule and each mom takes a week and we visit at each's house for few hours, usually in the morning around 10-12ish. All of us now have two kids about the same age as Jonah & Vera. Some of the older kids are in nursery school and sometimes miss playgroup. Jonah hasn't been for almost a year because he had been in full time daycare from May 2011 through January 2012 (because I was sick) and then in nursery school until the rodent episode... and then we moved. So all this to explain, today was playgroup day for us - first time in almost 2 mos that Vera and I had been and first time in almost year for Jonah. We were all very excited... and maybe a bit anxious. Then it turned out, at the last minute, playgroup was on the verge of being cancelled due to host sickness. So, we offered to regroup and have it at our house - spontaneous offer and we hadn't prepared at all - but hey that is what kaleidoscoping chaos is all about. So we did it and had it at our house.

We put Vera down for a nap and then Jonah and I decided to make a Passover cake for the playgroup (best baking experience with toddler-it all comes in the box! even the little pan!). Jonah had a great time making the cake and we talked the whole time about sharing with our buddies who were coming to visit - all of our toys! And making sure we were all set with the rules: no hitting, no biting, no kicking, etc.

And then our buddies arrived! Jonah did well when it was just one of his buddies. Then more buddies arrived and he ws still OK. But then there was a whole crew of us in the playroom - 4 moms, 3 big brothers, 2 little brothers and 2 little sisters... and he started to lose it a bit. There were at least 3 episodes of full on melt downs that required total Time Outs in his room. At some point, we had a session of cake eating. At another point, Jonah begged to go outside and managed to get a bunch of us outside. Lots of biking, throwing & kicking balls, playing with grass, and running around ensued (and a bit of Spiderman and Batman role playing for good measure). Vera had a great time and laughed for most of playgroup. It was awesome to see my mom friends. Although, it is totally interesting how our conversations happen in three sentence blurbs and not one conversation ever really gets finished... We almost always need to plan specific "staff meetings" to really discuss anything of note (these meetings often occur during the evenings in TBD places where there are menus and full bars and we take taxis home). When everyone left, Jonah kept walking around the house saying, "where did all my buddies go? mom, I want my buddies back please???" He does love to play and especially to play with his buddies!

In the end, we had a pretty good day - not without its stressful moments. Jonah needs to work on sharing and working through his aggression (weirdly the Pharaoh punching bag seems to be helping... see picture here), but he is an awesome chef! Vera is still giggling her way into every one's heart. And the two of them, well, they just love each other sooo much!

mixing up by hand

with an electric mixers- wow!!!!

watching it bake in the oven

who knew Passover cake could be such a fun activity?

and the box is loads of fun too!

and it tastes great too!

with vanilla Greek yogurt for a snack! yummy!

my cutie pies!

so much love!

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Ending on Easter, Egghausted and Exhaling...

It is very very very late... but I promised a post every day and we need to end our holiday celebration on a high note so here we go! We woke up in Brooklyn this morning for Easter Sunday and put on our Easter best. Jocelyn's dad is the priest at the Episcopalian church and we go every year to 9am morning services. This morning was sunny and beautiful. As always, we sat in the first row, reserved for the family of the priest. The kids made it through 90 minutes of the 120 minute services. Jonah and Vera sang their own words to many of the songs. Vera was happy happy happy until she wasn't and then she was just tired. Jonah was good but then just needed to get out and run. They did better than some of adults that I know. After church, there was plenty of running around with their cousins and friends in the front yard. We also wished many of the neighbors a Happy Passover-as the church is right in the middle of Crown Heights-a religious Jewish neighborhood. Some of our good friends from Manhattan also stopped by for the festivities and brought some yummy homemade "kosher for Passover" chocolate clusters for dessert-well done! There was the mandatory egg hunt contest and the giving of Easter baskets. And of course a full Sunday Easter dinner was served. Lots of hugs, kisses, drinks, food, friends, family and just plain old good happiness and celebrations was had by all! Nothing can beat that! Jonah and Vera loved every minute they got to hang with their Grandma and Grandpa and all of their relations. Around 6pm we put on our PJs, packed up the car and started on our way home to Washington, D.C. We made a few wrong turns along the way, hit some traffic and after almost 7 hours, we got home safe and sound. All in all, a pretty fantastic three days of adventuring and celebrating... pretty much a perfectly kaleidoscoped holiday weekend! Thank you powers that be for giving us each other, such a good time and keeping us safe! Check out some of Sunday's silliness below:

all dressed up and ready to go... up the stairs?

all dressed up and ready to play cars!

mama and Jonah!

post church fun in the sun!

tulips!

grass!

you say there is going to be an egg hunt...

not sure I want to play...

all right gonna give it a try- there is one!

forget the egg hunt... I found the basket full of eggs!

a little blurry, but the only photo of the two of them...

Jake and Vera! Best Buddies

Aaron and Jonah! Cousins... boys with balls!

Having Easter Sunday - literally- with a little Passover on the side (black hat style!)

Sunday Easter dinner includes Matzah in the middle of the table! Thank you Uncle Jerry!

The happy family!

as the day ends, the Easter Bunny makes an appearance in her bunny feetie pajamas

Jonah is so happy! a basket full of treats and a balloon! whoop whoop!

The last photo of the day: Vera chillin' with Uncle Jerry waiting to go home! Priceless!

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Pesach with the Matriarchs!

Tonight's post is dedicated to my grandmother, Beulah Madeline Kaplan - our true Matriarch. She turned 95 this year in March. She is my only living grandmother and is "GG" to my children. The GG stands for Great Grandmother and years ago when she had her first great grandchild she came up with that name. We celebrated her birthday today at our second seder at my parent's house with my brother and his family. Five of GG's great grandchildren were there and all of my parent's grandchildren. This is a wonderful thing.

GG and I have always been very close. I am told that when I was about 2 or 3 (the same age as my son, Jonah today) I had memorized her phone number and would call her when I wanted to run away from home. When I was five, I supposedly took the NYC number 44 public bus from Queens to the Bronx to visit her by myself... and sat behind the bus driver and she was waiting for me at her stop?!?! Anyway, for as long as I can remember GG has been one of my best friends. She took me on NYC adventures when I was very young: shopping at the big Macy's in Manhattan, to see the Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall, to listen to the piano at some big bank in Manhattan, and to eat at fancy restaurants with big deli sandwiches and big cream cakes in the windows! She taught me how to type on an old typewriter. She wrote me letters. She bought be presents. We made chopped liver in her kitchen and filet of sole with homemade french fries... I can still remember exactly how it all smelled in her little kitchen in the Bronx. She met my grandfather when she was 16 and they we were this awesome couple the entire time I knew them. When my grandfather died years ago, everyone was worried about grandma. What would she do without him - he did it all: paid the bills, drove the car and made all the decisions-they were old school and they were in love! I remember sitting with her after that and telling her,"grandma, promise me you will be ok and if you need anything, you will call me. I will be here for you. I need you to be here for me, I need you to be here to tell me all the stories, there are so many stories you need to tell me." And she did it. I taught her how to balance her check book. She had her own credit card, And although, she did not learn how to drive, she did learn how to take buses to everywhere she needed to go and she was doing great! We talked almost every day. I spent many of my vacations (from college, law school and later just from work) with her in Florida (she is snow bird), adventuring together. Then at some point it was clear she was beginning to go down the Alzheimer's path. Even then, she pushed through on her own. Until she couldn't.

For a significant time now, my mom and dad have been taking care of GG because she can not be alone. They spend their time between NY and Florida. They are amazing caregivers and I am lucky to have such a wonderful family. GG is lucky to have such an amazing daughter and son-in-law.

Five years ago I married my partner, Jocelyn, in a fantastic ceremony and party in downtown Manhattan. We got engaged the year before over Chanukah and went to spend New Year's Eve with my grandmother that year. I had not told anyone that Jocelyn and I were dating until we were engaged, so everyone was shocked and very curious when they heard the news-especially since Jocelyn was the first woman I had ever dated. When we showed up in Florida and we told my grandmother, she looked at me and said, "oh so they are doing that now? that's nice honey. Wow, let me see the ring! I love the ring - can I try it on?" My grandmother LOVES jewelry!!! She is also an amazing woman. A year or so later, she walked down the aisle and danced at my wedding and she looked absolutely gorgeous!

GG and Jonah have had lots of fun together and Jonah loves his GG. This makes my heart warm. Vera knows GG too and GG just wants to "eat her up" this too makes me happy beyond explanation.

I hope one day that I have grandchildren who love and respect me as I do GG. And if I can have some great grandchildren too, that would be the icing on the cake.

When I was in 7th or 8th grade I entered a French poem contest (I was taking French at the time). My grandmother always told me stories how she had a grandmother who only spoke French and her mother would leave her with her and they couldn't really communicate. I thought that was funny and interesting and decided to write a poem in French about a grandmother and granddaughter. I think it was a good poem. I remember I wrote it about my grandma (GG) and me. I ended up winning Honorable Mention in the national competition. When I get back home I am going to try and find the poem and post it. Even when I was in middle school, I knew I was very lucky to have a grandma like her.

Today was a very full and wacky day with Nana, Pop and GG and my brother's family. The pictures below give you a glimpse of how the day went. The kids had a blast-which I guess is the point. GG hasn't been feeling so well lately, She is very tired and has a terrible cough. She spent most the day resting. She isn't the same GG she was even 5 years ago at my wedding. But I watched her today. And there were these awesome moments when her eyes twinkled and she let us see a little glow. These moments happened when she was looking at one of her great grandchildren. In one moment, Jonah went to her while she was resting in her chair and said very loudly, "happy birthday GG, I love you so much!" and she beamed him a smile and said I love you too so much! and tussled his hair and he hugged her. In another moment, she was playing peak-a-boo with Vera for a few seconds when Vera was in her high chair and both were laughing in delight. In my head, I "kaleidoscoped" these images into others and they were all beautiful, fleeting and eternal. My children know their GG and love her, just as I do.

She always sent me cards for everything and always addressed them "to my dearest darling heather" - well I hope she knows that she will always be "our dearest darling GG" and so much more.