kaleidoscoping chaos...: Four Letter Words

Some words initiate extreme anxiety and stress when I say them out loud next to each other:

give
bath
wash
comb
hair
with
soap

I am hyperventilating just writing them down.

These words are really neutral until I add Jonah's name to them as in...

Give Jonah a Bath and Wash his Hair with Soap and use a Comb...

Ooops, I think I just broke into a cold sweat.

You might think I am being a bit hyperbolic... but really I am not, well, not exactly.

Jonah actually loves his bath. He also loves taking a bath with Vera. I enjoy giving them both baths, reading bath books and playing with all the bath toys with them. It is not the bath that is the problem. It is the HAIR.

Jonah has a lot of hair. It is amazing hair. I LOVE his hair. I just do not enjoy having to wash it. We only wash it once a week. Even then, I have to muster the energy and focus to do it. And I often try different "distractions" to make it bearable. The actual washing of his hair isn't the problem-it is the combing out of his hair.

I have done a ton of research on Jonah's hair and how to care for it. Seriously. The correct term for his hair is "mixed race" hair. I have talked to friends and family. I have facebooked about it. And I have done intensive Internet googling. I have come up with a "protocol" for our hair washing and combing out session. It goes like this:

saturate hair with water using a hand held shower head... (this is a must)
use California Baby shampoo, lather and rinse - do this 2X
saturate hair again
use about 1/3 bottle (seriously 1/3 of the bottle) of "Mixed Chicks" Leave-in Conditioner for Kids -- smoosh it all over (see here)
section hair and comb it out, very very carefully!!!
if I am doing right, the screaming only happens once or twice...
towel dry
then put three products on his wet hair

mousse
gel
spray

In between washing, NO COMBING. Spray his hair every morning and use fingers to work it through.

That is our protocol. And it works for now.

As with everything in life, it is never just about the hair, there is something emotional too. I haven't cut Jonah's hair since he was born. Jocelyn thinks I am crazy, but I can't cut it. There are so many reasons why I just don't want to cut it (insert crazy mommy list of not wanting her baby to grow up here...), but the one that I cling to closely is a the Jewish tradition, upsherin, that most Jews don't follow. The tradition requires that the child's hair not be cut until after the child's 3rd birthday (see a Jewish mom's story here). The reason the child's hair is not cut is because a child is compared to a tree. In the Torah, we are commanded that we can not pick the fruit of tree until after the tree is at least three years old. So too, we must not cut the hair of the child until the child is three years old.

For now, Jonah's hair has not been cut. He turns three this June and it will be time to cut it. How that is going to work I have not yet figured out.

What I have figured out is that if I kaleidoscope up some fun "project" for Jonah while he is in the bath and I am conducting the aforementioned protocol, the whole thing works out much better. Thus, I am always searching for such bath time projects. I have found many on Pinterest and one of my favorite blogs, Not-so-SAHM (see examples here and here) A big favorite of ours is bath paint. I have tried it a few ways, but the easiest and one that seems to work the best for us is simple:

food coloring + shaving cream + cool paint brushes = FUN!

Tonight we had painting party in tub and there was no crying! None! Score for mommy and Jonah!

His hair is really long now. He told me I did a good job tonight. He gave me a thumbs up on the comb out... and when I asked him if he wanted to get a hair cut, he asked me if I would be there too? I said yes and then he said, "OK Mom..."

Yes, his hair is long. But he is also talking about everything and thinking about everything all the time. He is growing up. I can almost see the wheels turning in his head sometimes. He is just this little guy with so much to say and so many thoughts. He is very excited to "get bigger, like you mom..." I am excited (and a bit tearful) to watch him do so.

I think three is just the right time to get a hair cut. For the next 7 weeks, we will still do our protocol and projects. Then he'll get a hair cut. After that, we will still need do a protocol and a project in the bath, but it won't be the same. The first fruits will have been picked, the baby tree will be just a bit wiser and older... and yes "bigger..."